Most Egyptians take the easy way out to get a driver's license in Cairo. They either find a family friend with authority who gets it for them, or give the 3askari who hangs around the place 500LE, who also gets it for them. Those who cannot afford the 500LE or do not have a family member with authority are forced to take the Exam.
I do not have a family member with authority and would rather spend 500LE on shoes, so I decided to do it the hard way and actually take the exam. Most people advised against it. The chances of passing are usually very low. But if I had taken the easy way out, how would I know I passed if I never really took the exam? Confusing? Maybe.... if you're Egyptian you shouldn't find this too difficult to process.
So sitting in the car with shaky knees, I tried to urge other drivers to get ahead of me in line. Until one guy yelled at me, "What are you getting away from! You'll eventually have to take the exam!" ....Good point.
How I managed to get my shaky legs to work the car and get into the examination point, I don't know. All I knew was that I had this strange faith in God that was overwhelming me. I knew I couldn't really do it. I knew that I was a crappy driver. I knew that I was a bundle of nerves. I knew that I was going to fail, but I also knew that I didn't really know anything. That God knew all, and that God was going to make me pass this thing. Right?
So driving through the reclining S-shaped track, marked by bright orange cones... I kept my foot on the brakes to keep the car from going too fast, and during the inclining S-shaped track,also marked by bright orange cones... I kept my foot on the gas to keep my car from reversing. We drove in a very long line. Stopping and moving. Often, a driver who knocks over a cone, gets yelled at and shooed out of the exam area, while the others watch in horror and wonder if they are next. I kept my eyes focused on the cones. They do paint them orange for a reason.
So, came my turn, the dreaded car reversing test.
Reversing in a U-shape? Is that even possible? At this point I was already convinced that I knocked over three cones, even though no one came to yell at me and shoo me out, even though none of the cones were knocked over. I still pretended that it wasn't me who knocked them over. What kind I say? Bundle of nerves indeed.
As I was driving into the U-shape, I got closer to the entrance, or rather, the exit. The exit from this horrible place that made my heart beat so quickly and my knees so wobbly. Suddenly someone with authority was yelling at a bunch of people who had gathered around the exit. Watching their loved ones during the exam. Cheering. Motioning signals. Yelling. Cheering some more. Egyptians can be so cute.
The guy shooed them all out, they had gotten on his nerves, obviously. He wanted to keep it scary, and solemn. He closed the giant iron door that separated us from the outside world. Barked some more orders. Then came up to me and barked "Reverse the car!!!!"
YESSSS SIRRRR!!
So my jelly legs reversed the car and got out of the place as fast as I could. I didn't even try and look back at the flash of orange that I left dancing. I got out of the iron door. I wanted to get away from the yelling man and the hideous orange cones that decided my fate. I'm sure they paint them orange for a reason.
When I got out of the car, I was told to go gather my papers. And believe it or not, I passed with flying colors.
